Wednesday and Thursday

I'm still having real trouble with the WiFi.  My iPad continues to show that it is connected to the internet, but none of the apps can get on.  As I said before, this is a known flaw in the iPad, and every so often I can get on, but I'm not counting on it.  I'll keep trying, and also try in Pondicherry, and see if I can't find an internet cafe or something.

Some highlights from the last two days:

I was invited to attend a women's book discussion group at the YWCA.  I didn't know what this would be about, but I decided to go, and I'm glad I went.  There were only 5 other women there, which they found disappointing, but it turned out to be a good number for discussion.  Each woman talked about the most recent spiritual book she had read.  I was familiar with most of them: Jonathan Livingston Seagull, The Last Temptation of Christ, Simple Abundance, and The Bible.  The only one I didn't know what called "Letters to my Children" by an Indian author, first name starts with S, last name De.  The portion that was read out talked about how she was initially put off by the "American" habit of saying "I love you" to children all the time, imported from TV shows and movies.  However, she tried it, and despite the fact that her children laughed themselves silly, she kept it up.  This provoked quite a bit of discussion.  All the women agreed that they had never heard their parents say "I love you," not to each other or to their children.  Clearly, they felt loved, but the words were never said.

One woman said that she had never heard her parents say it, and yet theirs was a marriage of choice, which given the time frame, must have meant that they fell in love.  However, she said that her father brought her mother flowers every single day.  Another woman said that she had never heard it, or said it to her children, as it seemed fake and unnatural.  They did ask me if American  parents really say this to their children all the time.  I said that, for example, when I drop my daughter at school, I say "Do you have your lunch?  Do you have your homework? I love you!"  This made them all laugh, as it sounded so incongruous to them.  They asked if my parents ever say they love me.  I said yes, that every time we talk on the phone, we say "OK, talk to you later, I love you."  "Love you, too!"  This prompted some discussion about how parents are always parents, no matter how old you get.

There was discussion about the other books, too, and despite not having read something to discuss, I played my usual role of facilitator, bringing out the common themes that had come up.  It was interesting to me how much of the discussion was familiar, and the little touches that were new.


The Sri Lankan couple who are going to Pondicherry with us this weekend came for breakfast.  They are very, very nice.  They both speak excellent English.  She runs a boutique, and he teaches French.  They met Mrs. Chandra at a Christian conference, and have been visiting back and forth with her for years.  Mrs. Chandra had given us both the same phone/e-mail contact for a guesthouse in Pondicherry, and we were having trouble getting through.  Wije (pronounced Vijay, the husband) had called them, and they said they only took bookings via e-mail.  We had both emailed and gotten no reply. He called them again, and they said that they received the email, but they made bookings on  a first come, first served basis in person.  He asked what if there was nothing available, and they didn't seem concerned.  They are taking a bus and will arrive about 6:30am, so they will go straight to the guesthouse and see if they can get something.  We are coming by car and will arrive around 11:30, so they'll call us with what they find out.

I discovered in the guidebook that the guesthouse is run by the Sri Aurobindo Society, which is a kind of international New Age group.  This might explain their lack of worldliness.  On the other hand, Mrs. Chandra says that she has sent many people to them over the years, and this is the first time there has been a problem like this, so maybe there is just a new process in place.


I went to seminary with Nirmala Peter (now Reinschmidt), who is from Chennai.  As soon as I knew I was coming here, I emailed her, and she sent contact information for her family.  I lost the phone numbers, and then couldn't figure out how to make them work (despite my handily chart, above), but we eventually met up.  Her sister's husband, Christopher, is the manager of a Christian bookstore, and they live only a few blocks from here.  He stopped by Wed. on his way home from work.  He offered to take us with him on his motorcycle, but I demurred.  We had a nice chat.  His son, Paulson, is working on a master's degree at Bethel, and lives only a few blocks from me! We agreed that he would pick us up Thursday night and take us to their home.

We had a wonderful time.  Chrisopher and Jeyanthi are very warm and hospitable.  I would have picked Jeyanthi out as Nirmala's sister anywhere.  They live in a typical middle-class apartment.  There is one main room, with a TV at one end, seating area, and at the other a sink and the dining area.  The kitchen is a little alcove off the main room, and there is a toilet and a balcony, and a bedroom.  Everything was spotlessly clean, and they had family pictures on the walls, as well as crosses.

Jeyanthi had cooked a fantastic meal for us.  Vindya and I sat at the table, and they sat with us, not eating, but keeping a careful watch on our plates.  Any time we showed signs of being done with something, they gave us more.  We had a kind of rice noodles formed into pancakes, which I have never had before, but were quite good, chicken in gravy, curried potatoes, and I'm not even sure what else.  Vindya actually ate less than she usually does, because she had her eye on a box of cookies I brought as a hostess gift and wanted to save room.  (We never opened the box, which she overlooked.)

Christopher speaks a little Telugu, and Vindya was happy to tell him about life with me.  Apparently, I don't give her enough sweets.  We looked at family pictures and had a nice visit.  Jeyanthi gave us both jasmine for our hair, which made Vindya just glow.  She pulled it out Friday morning to wear again, but the desk clerk took it away because it was wilted, and she should have fresh every day.

After some consultation with Nirmala's other sister, Weyanthi, it was agreed that she would pick us up on Friday at 3:45 sharp at the YWCA.  She works at the Women's Christian College, and lives with her parents about an hour and a half away.  She will bring a car and take us and Jeyanthi to her parents' home for the evening.    Depending on when we hear from the passport people, they will take us to the beach, and maybe other places.


Deb sent me a new copy of the vaccination affidavit, and I contacted the consulate here.  They do notarize documents.  I made an appointment for Tuesday, which was the next available slot.  I had to do this on the internet, which meant that I had to borrow the office computer again.  The upside to that was that when I was informed to "Print this page and bring it with you to your appointment.  You will not be admitted without this page."  I was able to print to the office printer.  So no I have a plan for Tuesday!


I called my parents to talk to LiJun.  The first time I miscalculated, and instead of calling at 8pm, I called at 12:30midnight.  They were surprisingly coherent, but we agree that I should call again in the morning.  I called back and LiJun was waiting to hear from me.  "Mama, I miss you, when are you coming home?"  followed by "How can you stand the heat?"  Both excellent questions!  I put Vindya on the phone, and she chattered in Telugu, which LiJun said was hard to hear.  Dad said they gave our slots on the cruise to friends, with the proviso that, if we miraculously appeared, we get our spots back.  I had to say it would indeed be a miracle, as they leave this weekend.  LiJun isn't as excited about the ship as she is about spending time with her cousins.