Sunday Visit

Sunday was very slow. I had been told that Vindya would be available around 4. The driver wasn't at all clear where we were going, despite the address, and I was somewhat pleased that I was able to direct him the rest of the way, based on advertisements, shop windows and a general "feel" for which was the right direction, after he got to the right neighborhood.

When I arrived, I was told that she was sleeping, and I needed to wait. So, I waited. While I was doing that, a young lady came in with treats for the children. We chatted a bit, and she told me that her uncle had recently died and that she was doing this in his memory because he liked children.

None of the people in the front were people I recognized except the watchman out front, and later, Vindya's direct caregiver. They tried talking to me in Hindi, which didn't work, and Telugu, which didn't work either. One of them managed to tell me in very broken English that her second son is in Oklahoma, studying at the University. I told her that my father was from Oklahoma. We repeated "Oklahoma" back and forth at each other for a bit, and then I got the bright idea of singing it for her. She didn't seem to know what to make of that and wandered away, so it may not have been the best idea.

Eventually, Vindya came out with her caregiver. She was shut down, and now I wonder if she was just tired the other time, as well. She didn't smile, just came and sat on my lap. I couldn't engage her at all, with anything. Another girl came out with her, and seemed to be something of a staff favorite. She talked to me, told me in English that her name is Puja and she is 10 years old and in the 2nd class. She had on earrings, a necklace, bracelets and anklets, far more jewelry than I have seen on any other children. She was openly fascinated by the toys I pulled out for Vindya, and wanted to play with them. I was a little rude probably, but I told her no, those are Vindya's. I don't mind Vindya inviting her friends to play, or sharing with them, but that wssn't the vibe I was getting off this exchange. The adults talked to Puja and sent her off.

She reappeared shepherding lines of smaller kids, who lined up for treats, shook hands, and said "Thank you" in English. Vindya just watched. One of the littler girls was clearly her friend, ran up to her and grabbed her arm and tried to pull her into line, but she resisted. This girl stayed, jabbering to the caretaker and Vindya, after the other kids went back behind the curtain. She had a big grin, and seemed like a very happy child.

The young lady offered Vindya some cookies, and she took some and just sat, silent, not eating them. The young lady asked if she were my daughter, and I said yes. She asked if I had left her at the sisuvihar when she was a baby, and I explained about being from the US and adopting. She was very surprised, and discussed this at length (I think) with the adults and Puja.

After a bit more, I told the caretaker in sign language that Vindya was tired, and suggested she go back. She went very slowly, with both hands full of cookies and her little happy friend. The young lady had more questions for me, and we had started to talk when Vindya started to cry, really loudly. I ran over, got out a kleenex, and started dabbing away the tears, doing the "yoy, yoy, yoy" thing, until her little friend threw her arms around her and made her smile. This seemed to be enough, for some reason. She leaned against me for a few seconds, and touched my cheek again, and went back behind the curtain with a smile.

Not 7 year old behavior, but I didn't think Puja was acting like a 10 year old, either. I'm still worried about cognitive and behavioral delays, and wishing I had a much better idea of when we would be back in Minnesota so I could make an appointment with the International Clinic. However, her personality is quite sweet, so I'm hopeful.